dead battery in Golf, we rechareged it, but now apparently we have to reset the trasmission. How. do I do this?

I've read that you will need to reset the throttle body and not the transmission. See post #2 in this thread....http://volkswagenownersclub.com/vw/showthread.php/26779- Disconnecting-battery-dire-consequences. It is a easy fix but you need the software tools to do so. I'd have her purchase a new battery if she constantly has to jump start it. It is at the end of its life. Batteries only last 4-6 years.

Battery is new. She left headlights on once, and dome light twice. Where van I get software?

Take the car over to your local dealership or garage.

Would be smart to have the voltage system checked while at the vw dealer. If the alternator is not putting out enough juice can cause the same issue. tho im guessing these drains were more caused by the fact she left the lights on. The ding ding dinging is the sure sign thats been done :P checking the voltage is more a precaution to make sure everything is alright and that there is not infact an underliying issue.